Saturday, October 27, 2007

Deciding if I should Share with you

I created this not so original blog on a whim. Well I've thought about doing it before when I have admired others for doing it, like Justin Zoradi and Beth Wilson and Jan Carson and Kevin Saiki. But today I did it. And I put past thoughts up and now I'm considering the possibility of actually telling others to take a peek. I know I shouldn't worry so much about what people think of me, but get real, I do, I just do. And so I don't like people to read what I write unless I am very secure in knowing that that person will tell me it's good, like maybe my husband or Beall or maybe George.

So I guess people write on Blogs assuming that people want to read their thoughts on a particular thing, like maybe HIV/AIDS would be appropriate for my blog or teaching kids who mostly don't like me or at least act that way. So...what should my first official post be??

How about worry. I have some things I could worry about in my position. Like, how about a mortgage. That's common right? We are leaving our home and won't have a job that gives us money to pay our mortgage so we have to rent it out. We've had 2 people show interest in our lovely home. We've even said, "hey, use our stylish and comfortable furniture, we don't mind". But nothing.

The clock is ticking until Dec. 2nd when we want to shut our car doors and pull out of our common driveway one more time. What a great life moment that will be, I'll most likely cry and also think about what song I want playing in the backround to help me remember the moment for a long time from then. It would be so fantastic and it feels very necessary to have our place rented by then, but so many things have to go right for that to occur.

Doesn't Jesus address this? (rhetorical question) Something about clothing the lillies that are out in the elements and taking care of little birds...so if he cares about the lillies and the birds doesn't He care even so much more for what I need? So I guess I'll find out what I believe about what Jesus thinks about me in these next few weeks. I believe, Lord help my unbelief.

Those who find themselves utterly empty will be blessed because only then will there be enough space for my kingdom to be given.

Those who realize they have lost everything and acknowledge their deep loss fully will be blessed because then is the time that there is room in their hearts for my comfort.

Those who know who they are and don't have to prove their power are blessed because they will be given everything I have made.

Those who intensely desire for their goodness to be wrapped up in their love for Christ are blessed because when that happens they will be given all they want in Me.

Those who have hearts full of mercy for others and a desire to take care of them will be blessed because then, from me, they will receive the purest of care.

2 comments:

*corinne said...

i'm moved by your honesty and eloquence. i feel privileged to read your writing and call you friend. <3

Beth Wirth said...

I found your blog via the wild web of beautiful blogging (namely, Anna's). . .thanks for the nod. I love your writing.
Miss you,
Beth